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Scene: Field of cornstalks bordering the Shire. Frodo
and Sam are walking along. Suddenly two Hobbits rush
out from the cornstalks and collide into Frodo and Sam.
FRODO
Merry! Pippin! What are you doing here? And what’s that
you’re carrying, Pippin?
PIPPIN
A picnic basket. What does it look like?
MERRY
We stole it, uh, I mean, we borrowed it from a family
of tourists.
FRODO
The Ranger isn’t going to like this, fellas. You know
the rules.
PIPPIN
Yeah. “Don’t feed the Hobbits.” Stupid signs posted
all over place! I’m tired of nuts and berries! I want
something I can really sink my teeth into! Like ham
sandwiches and cake and pie! I betcha this picnic basket
has all that and more in it!
SAM
How’d you get this basket from the tourists?
PIPPIN
It was easy, Sam. We’re smarter than the average Hobbit.
That’s all you need to know. Come one, fellas. Let’s
eat!
FRODO
Uh, oh. Here comes the Ranger!
PIPPIN (grabs the picnic basket)
Crap! Let’s make a run for it!