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*at Inspector Frodo's house*
*Frodo is sitting in a hammock in his garden while Sam
trims*
Frodo: Ah, my day off! Rest and relaxation at last.
*suddenly Gandalf pokes out of a hole in a tree*
Gandalf: Frodo!
Frodo: Ah! Chief! What are you doing here?
Gandalf: Frodo, I have an emergency mission for you.
*gives Frodo a roll of paper, wrapped in a gold Ring*
Frodo: (reading the paper) One Ring of Sauron discovered.
It must be destroyed in the cracks of Mount Doom. A
white wizard
has recently been employed by Sauron, and also be on
the look-out for Sauron's agents, who will try to take
the Ring. This
message will self destruct. (stops reading) But it's
my day off, chief!
Gandalf: Stop calling me chief! And this is a real emergency.
The fate of the world is at stake.
Frodo: Well, chief, vacation or no vacation, I'm always
on duty! *tosses the paper into the hole*
Gandalf: Oh no!!!
*explosion*
Frodo: Sam, I have a very special mission right now.
So you stay here with Bill and keep watch over the house.
*Frodo walks off*
Sam: Did you hear that, Bill? Ring of Sauron....wow.
This sounds like heavy stuff. I think we should keep
an eye on him.
Bill: Neeeeigh!
*cut to Frodo walking in the woods*
Frodo: So, this Ring is the source of Sauron's power,
huh? Looks pretty harmless. I wonder...if I should try
it on...
*Frodo is suddenly approached by a Black Rider on a
horse*
Frodo: Oh, hello good sir! I'm looking for Mordor! Do
you know the way?
Black Rider: Why certainly, heh heh. Right this way,
Frodo. Here, I even have a horse you can ride.
Frodo: These country folk are so nice.
*Black Rider takes out a circular orb*
*interior of Sauron's lair, we see a huge chair and
a video screen*
Sauron: Do you have the Ring?
Black Rider: Yes, Sauron. I'm leading that fool Frodo
right into Mordor! The Ring will be yours for the taking.
Sauron: Good work. Hehehahah. Soon I'll have the Ring
and Frodo will be eliminated!
*back to the woods*
Frodo: So anyway, I have to throw the Ring into the
lava pit to destroy it.
Black Rider: Oh yes, we know all about the Ring. I'll
take you a friend of mine, Saruman, who will help you.
*Sam and Bill are hiding in the bushes along the path*
Sam: Bill! I think that guy is a Sauron Agent! Keep
an eye on Frodo, while I try and find out more information
about this
Saruman.
Bill: Neigh!
*At Saruman's castle, Saruman is talking to a little
orb*
Saruman: Yes Sauron. Frodo should be coming this way
very soon. We've got a little treat set up for him!
Heheheh.
*Saruman turns to his Orc army outside*
Saruman: Do you have the dam set up?
Orc: Yes, Saruman. Once Frodo walks by, we'll burst
the dam and drown him!
Saruman: Excellent. The Ring is as good as ours!
*Frodo and the Black Rider are walking through a forest*
Black Rider: Be careful, this forest is known to have
elves in it. They won't want us trespassing.
Frodo: Don't worry, I'm an expert at dealing with elves.
*Bill, in the bushes, watches over them. Suddenly, an
arrow is pointing at his head*
Bill: Neigh???
*Bill is surrounded by elves*
Elf: Who dares walk in the woods of the Lady!
Bill: Neigh! *runs away*
Elf: After him!
*the elves give chase, into an elven city. Bill loses
the elfs, and comes across a white elven cloak, and
puts it on. With
his disguise he's able to escape*
*Meanwhile, Sam is in front of Saruman's fortress*
Sam: Hmm...how to get in. There must be a way. Ah, here
we go.
*Sam creeps through the fortress and comes across two
Orcs talking*
Orc1: One of the orcs had to quit post, so go fill in
for him.
Orc2: What do I have to do?
Orc1: When Saruman gives the signal, we burst the dam,
drowning Frodo and getting the Ring!
Orc2: Ah
Sam: Gasp! Oh no! *takes out an orb* Bill! Bill!
*back to Bill*
Bill: Neigh?
Sam: Saruman's planning to burst the dam and drown Frodo!
You have to stop them!
Bill: Neigh!
*back to Sam*
Orc1: Ah, what have we here! A spy!
Sam: Oh!
*back with Frodo*
Black Rider: Ah, we're almost to Saruman's tower.
Frodo: The sooner the better!
*Bill sees the orcs burst the dam, and gushing water
comes down the gulch*
Bill: Neigh!!!
*Bill jumps in front of Frodo and the Black Rider*
Frodo: Hey, that guy's in a white cloak. It's the white
wizard! Sir, you're under arrest!
Bill: Neigh! *runs away*
Frodo: Come back here! *kicks his horse, sending it
speeding off* Wowsers! Whoaaaa...
Black Rider: What! Hey, come back here! *chases after
Frodo*
*the gush of water just misses Frodo and washes away
the Black Rider*
Black Rider: Arrgh!!
Saruman: No! That stupid Frodo!
*Sauron calls up Saruman on the orb*
Saruman: Sauron! Uh..hi!
Sauron: Did you get Frodo?
Saruman: Well, er, I guess we missed a few calculations,
and we...
Sauron: Fool! Frodo is getting too close! I want him
eliminated!!
Saruman: Y-y-yes sir! *orb shuts off* Guard, relay a
message to our head spy Gollum, and tell him that Frodo
is on Mount
Doom and must be stopped!
Orc: Yes sir.
*Frodo is riding up Mt Doom*
Frodo: Drat. Lost him. Oh well, I have to dispose of
the Ring.
*Gollum appears*
Gollum: Hello there, sssssir..
Frodo: Ah, a local. Sir, do you know the way to the
crack of Doom?
Gollum: Yessss. I will guide you. Would you like me
to carry the precioussss for you?
Frodo: Huh?
Gollum: The ring...
Frodo: Oh, of course. If you want.
*as Frodo is handing the Ring to Gollum, suddenly Bill
comes out of nowhere and grabs it*
Gollum: Hey!
Frodo: Hey! It's that white wizard again! Come back
here!
Bill: Neigh!!! *runs towards the crack of Doom*
Gollum: Come back with the preciousssss!
*they runs inside the crater*
Frodo: Aha, you're trapped! Now I've got you!
GOllum: Noooo!! *leaps at Bill*
*Bill and Gollum wrestle over the Ring*
Frodo: Go go Frodo arms! *Frodo's arms stretch to grab
the Ring, but he accidentally pushes Gollum and the
Ring in*
Gollum: Nooooooooooooo!
Bill: Neigh! *runs off past Frodo*
Frodo: You! Get back here with the Ring!!!
*back at Saruman's fort, everything is collapsing due
to the lack of Saruman's power*
Saruman: Argh! Noooooo!!
*In a cell*
Sam: I have to get out of here!
*debris collapse and reveal a way out*
*Sam escapes just as the tower collapses*
*back at the Crack of Doom, Frodo runs out and meets
up with Gandalf*
Gandalf: Frodo! You destroyed the Ring! Well done!
Frodo: Er, uh? Oh yeah chief, it was nothing.
*Sauron views this through his orb*
Sauron: Curse you, Frodo! Curse you!!! I'll get you
next time Frodo, next tiiiiime!!
*EPILOGUE: back at Frodo's hobbit hole*
Frodo: Man, I'm starved. I didn't eat anything that
whole journey. Oh, I don't feel so good.
Sam: Mr Frodo, you really should have brought food with
you.
Frodo: Yes Sam, food is important for long trips, because
without food to eat you become weak physically and mentally,
which
can lead to malnutrition and other harmful ailments.
Bill: Neigh!
Sam: More potato stew?
Frodo:
What?
Sam: PO-TA-TOES.
*all laugh, camera zooms out*