Home | Literature Index | Movies & Broadway Index | Television Index | Music Index | Miscellaneous Index | Submit Your Own
If it was up to me
You Nazgul'd stop comin' up to me
With your swords out lookin' up to me
Like you want something from me
When last the ring was out you wasn't chasin' me
But now that I got this little magic ring
All the evil wanna come to me like it was some disease
But you ain't gettin' nothing from me cuz I'm from the holes of
[H-h-hobbiton! Hobbiton!]
I told 'em all,
All them little hobbits -- who you think helped stow them all?
Now you wanna keep it secret keep it safe like I ain't hid the thing?
What you think I sold the ring? Cuz I hate the bling?
Now all I wear is elven mail all day and a sword named Sting?
What? Cuz I been on a quest with a dwarf and an elf trying to hide this damn
Samwise fling?
I ain't having that.
This is the millenium of the THIRD age
And I ain't gonna write page after page
So give me one more orc of rage and f**k Gollum you can lock his cage.
So where's them Uruk-Hai at?
It's like Mordor in this habitat
But all you Moria rats know that I had spied the eye when you wuz blowin' candles
for that Bilbo's brat.
Nowadays every Nazgul wantsta talk
Like they got something to say
But nothing comes out when they move their lips
Just a bunch of jibberish
And motherf***ers act like they forgot about Frodo.