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The Pipeweed Brothers:
"What Were Once Vices Are Now Hobbits"

by Smaug Philter

Contains the hit song You Belong to Me plus I Can Read Your Mind and It Keeps You Runnin' along with these gems:


Takin' it to Mordor

ou don't know me but I'm a hobbit
I was raised here as an Underhill
You don't know my kind in your world
Fairly soon the time will tell
You, telling me the things you're gonna do for me
I ain't blind and I don't like what I think I see

chorus:
Takin' it to Mordor
Takin' it to Mordor, no more need for runnin',
Takin' it to Mordor
Takin' it to Mordor

Take this message from me, Dark Lord
I can find you everywhere
Wherever goblins live together
Tied in thrall and doom's despair
You, telling me the things you're gonna do for me
I ain't blind and I don't like what I think I see

[i]repeat chorus[i]

(thanks to Michael McDonald)

-----

What Smeagol Believes

It came from somewhere back in his long ago,
the sentimental fool don't see,
tryin' hard to re-possess what had yet to be his own
ruined his life.

They muster a sneer for his nostalgic tale,
never coming near the greed in their own hearts,
only to realize they want the Ring too.

It had a place in his life.
Evil never made Smeagol think twice.
As he rises to lead Frodo,
anybody else would surely know
that Ring's got to go.

But what a fool believes he needs,
no wizard has the power to reason away.
What seems to be is always better than nothing.
And nothing at all...

keeps sending him somewhere back in his long ago,
where he can still believe there's a Ring in his life.
Someday, somehow, It will return...

It had a place in his life.
Evil never made Smeagol think twice.
As he rises to bite Frodo,
anybody else would surely know
that Ring's got to go.

But what a fool believes he needs,
no hobbit has the power to reason away.
What seems to be is always better than nothing...


(thanks to Michael McDonald and Kenny Loggins)

-----

I Cheat The Dark Lord

The days grow short, the nights are gone;
since Shelob's lair I can't go on.
I cried "Gandalf!" to no avail;
now my life runs cold when the Nazgul wail.

But I cheat the Dark Lord, cheated him many times before;
the bell that tolls the hour has turned sweet life to sour.
Yes, I cheat the Dark Lord, and even when life has flown away
I leave the orcs behind.

The rain that fell upon Mount Doom
like blood we shed left me a ruin.
I crawl the night, I cannot sleep;
the strength you spend you cannot reap .

But I cheat the Dark Lord, cheated him many times before;
the bell that tolls the hour has turned sweet life to sour.
Yes, I cheat the Dark Lord, and even when life has flown away

I leave the orcs behind;
the glow of Sting will shine.
Lighted torches stare
at the hobbits there so far from home;
only lighted torches stare
at the lonely hobbits there so far from home.

Du du du du du du_____ du du,
du du du___ du du du___
du du du___ du du du___ .

Only lighted torches stare
at the lonely hobbits there so far from home.

(thanks to Patrick Simmons)

---

Minute by Minute

Hey, don't worry. I've been lied to.
I've been here many times before.
Sam, don't you worry. I know where I stand.
I don't need this flurry. I don't need your hand.
I know we could turn, blink, and Smeagol's gone.
Then I must be prepared anytime to carry on.

But minute by minute by minute by minute,
I keep holdin' on.
Minute by minute by minute by minute,
I keep holdin' on.

You would stay just to watch me, Smeagol,
wilt away on lies from you.
Can't stop the habit of livin' on the run.
Take it all for granted like you're the only one.
Ringbearin' alone, somehow that sounds nice.
You think I'm your fool. Well, you may just be right.

But minute by minute by minute by minute,
I keep holdin' on, now.
Minute by minute by minute by minute,
I keep holdin' on, Sam.
I keep holdin' on.

Seek the Ring and I'll be gone.
You'll reach out but I won't be there.
Just my luck that Sauron's Eye
May drive me mad ere I reach Mount Doom,
Will drive me mad ere I reach Mount Doom.

Minute by minute by minute by minute,
I'll be holdin' on. Oh, Dark Lord.
Minute by minute by minute by minute,
I'll be holdin' on.

Minute by minute by minute by minute,
I'll be holdin' on. Ring, to the destiny.
Minute by minute by minute by minute,
I'll be holdin' on.

(thanks to Michael McDonald and Lester Abrams)

-----

Long Quest Running

Down around in Mordor a half a mile from here
You see Nazgul flying
and you watch them disappear.

Without Sam, where would you be now, without Sam?

You know I saw that Smeagol down along our track;
He lost his Ring and his sanity
and they won't be comin' back.

Without Sam, where would you be right now, without Sam?

Well, the Fellowship is central
And on it turns Earth's fate
Got to keep on pushin, hobbit,
'cause you know you're runnin' late.

Without Sam, where would you be now, without Sam?

(mournful harmonica solo)
(repeat previous verse)


Where Mount Doom's fires keep churnin'
and the Eye looks 'round and 'round,
and the gold ring is cold and hard
and you've got to toss it down.

Without Sam, where would ya be right now,
without Sam, where would you be now?

Got to toss it, baby, baby, won't you throw it down?
Won't you throw it down?
Baby, baby, baby, baby, won't you throw it down?
Where the big orcs run
And the war is movin' on
You got to keep on movin',
Keep on movin',
Keep on movin',
Gonna keep on movin'.