What if "The Lord of the Rings" Had Been Written as "The Wizard of Oz"

"The Wizard of Isengard" by L. Frank Baum

by Istari Inc

We’re off to see the wizard
The wizard of Isengard
He’s wise, he’s strong, yet sometimes wrong
And frankly a bit retard
He seeks the Ring, it’s quite his thing
And once he’ll have it, he will sing
Yes, sing, and sing, he’ll sing just like a lark
"This Ring on my finger will make me look smart!"
We’re off to see the wizard,
The wizard of Isengard!

We’re off to see the wizard
The wizard of Isengard
With orcs he hunts the hobbit grunts
He hold in such low regard
He hunts them high, he hunts them low
To Orthanc high he’ll have them towed
Yes, towed and towed, until they break apart
"I’ll catch you, you know, ’cause I’m terribly smart!"
We’re off to see the wizard, the wizard of Isengard

We’re off to see the wizard
The wizard of Orthanc dark
His palantir he holds quite dear
To wield it is quite an art
The Stone that can look both far and near
And in it the Ring, it does appear
So near, so near, it almost breaks his heart
"That Ring will be mine!" he does yell and does bark.
We’re off to see the wizard
The wizard of Orthanc dark.

We’re off to see the wizard,
The wizard of Angrenost
Try as he might, it’s quite a plight
To lay his hand on what’’s lost
And men and elves , also the trees
They’ll fight the wizard till he flees
Yes, flee he will, yes flee since he was crossed
"That Grima, his blood I will turn into frost!"
We’re off to see the wizard,
The wizard of Angrenost.

We’re off to see the wizard,
The wizard called Curunir
No ring, no men, nor orcs or stone
Are left he once held so dear
Abandoned he was by his fellow wiz
Yes, Olorin gave him quite a dis
He curse him out, it rang loud in his ear
"You fool, no more wizard will you be, my dear!"
We’re off to see the wizard,
The wizard once called Curunir.

We’re off to see the wizard
The wizard who went to the West
He lost his life in quite a strife
But we know its for the best
That Grima fellow stabbed him cold
And with a dagger, brave and bold
He stabbed him, stabbed him in the back, no jest
"Oh man, does this hurt, you indeed are a pest!"
We’re off to see the wizard
The wizard who went to the West.