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Frodo Saga

by suraashu

-slow fade from black to a bird's eye of a landscape. it's very green and sports a few faeries flying around.-


Voiceover: "I, J. R. R. Tolkien, manga artist of Frodo Saga, hereby give permission to make Frodo Saga into a medieval fantasy epic."


(theme song)


-Black screen, enter Frodo's face from below, looking bleak and stressed-
Frodo: uuuh...? it's dark! why is it dark over here?... Oh no! We're probably trapped forever in a dank cave, where we'll starve to death forever never seeing the light of day and more importantly especially for me never again to return to master Gandalf!...
Sam: hmm... isn't it... *click*
-lights come on, shot of cave with very plastic-looking torches-
Frodo: Well done Hy!
Sam: I feel dizzy...
Frodo: We can't rest now! We're on a very important mission for master Gandalf! we've got to bring this ring that he gave me back to the Mount of Doom and throw it in! No, absolutely no time to waste and we'll have to get going right away although we will probably bump into many obstacles along the way i'm sure we will be fine! it's all for master Gandalf!
-Sam faints-
Frodo: !!! Don't die now!
Sam: ... I'm okay...
Frodo: Good! Off we go!
-cut to shot of Elrond, looking very sad-
Elrond: I finally made it back into my homeland but i am just a shadow of my former self... I wish i could go back to my home with my cute child and sexy wife...
-zoom to home of Elrond-
Celebrian (Elrond's wife): Glorfindel! Dinner's ready!
Glorfindel: Oh, you're such an awesome cook Celebrian...
Child: Yes! It's yummy!
Celebrian: Only the best for my child and husband!
-zoom to Elrond crying zigzag rivers of tears at the window-
Elrond: My friend, Glorfindel... with my wife... NO~!!!!!!!!!!
-cut to Frodo and Sam in a dense forest-
Frodo: Oooh, this ring is so heavy... I wonder if I should put it on? I know master Gandalf said I shouldn't, but I'm sure it will be easier to carry around if I wear it on my finger instead of holding it in my hands all the time.
Sam: *cough* *cough* But Gandalf sai-
Frodo: Yes! In order to help master Gandalf's cause, I will have to do whatever is necessary to get myself to the Mountain of Doom (Sam: It's the Mount of Doom) as fast as possible! No time to waste at all!
-closeup of ring, slipping on Frodo's finger. About ten seconds silence.-
Sam: *cough* *cough*
-another ten seconds silence-
Frodo: Right! Let's move! This ring needs to be thrown into the Hill of Doom (Sam: It's the Mount of Doom) and master Gandalf specifically said that we had to make sure it was destroyed completely, so it must be pretty important and we have to get there so we can't rest even to eat or drink or warm ourselves in the cold lonely nights on the plains where there is no food or water and we'll have to starve in order to get to the Canyon of Doom (Sam: ... Idiot.) and I haven't even mentioned the many fiends that undoubtly will try to stop us in this yourney, it's going to be arduous with many monsters appearing and.. (fades, still talking)
-cut to shot of tiny little bump on a grass field with a hole in it. camera pans to reveal to sets of boots, belonging to Frodo and Sam. camera tilts upwards to reveal their doubtful faces, looking at the tiny hole in the ground.-
Frodo: Well... it's certainly not as grand as I expected it to be...
Sam: But this sign (points at sign next to it, saying "Mount of Doom") says that this is it...
Frodo: Oh well! *pulls of ring and drops it into the hole*
Sam: Let's report back to master Gandalf...
Frodo: Yes!
-both turn around and walk off, with Sam fainting a couple of times and dragging himself up again.-



-end tune-.

next episode:
Frodo: Did you ever have to share the bathroom with two guys because both of you had to go but there was only one urinal left and neither of you could wait or back when you were in highschool and you had your girlfriend with you and everyone would ask you how far you'd gone and you had no clue what they were talking about and during lunchbreak you would sit next to her and be afraid to hold hands and then she'd break up with you and she'd be french kissing your best friend in another week, but really next episode won't be about that at all! so see ya!


-fade to black.-