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Ever see an elf shot? I saw a wight catch one in Mordor. We rigged his grave with a one way looking glass and charged an orc kin to watch. He never got the arrow out of his arm, they don't if the shot is right. That's the way they found him, barrow full of buried treasure, dawn of a new day. The look in his eye when he was hit - it was tasty. The Took cafe overlooked one end of Bag End. A maze of hobbit holes, tiny barns and stables. Perilously low doorways entered into underground lairs. On a stool sits naked Gandalf, sucking glowing leaves through an alabadter pipe. Wizards have no livers and nourish themselves excluvisely on smoke. A thin, translucent beard covers razor sharp teeth. They have razor sharp staffs with which they frequently blast each other to shreds in fights over manuscripts. These wizards secrete an addicting fluid from their upright staffs which prolongs epics by producing sequels. Adicts of wizard fluids are known of fans.
Any rings for Bilbo?