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Conclusion of Part 3, Chapter 6, with influences from the Kubrick film....
The West Havens it was and we set sail, oh my Brothers - and as we sailed Your Friend and Humble Narrator, feeling all oogly with a tremendous pain in the gulliver and ring-stump went out for a bit of spatchka.
And there she was in Heavensent and lusciouss glory, totally unclad and horrorshow groodies bouncing at me as she pushed me down and did the old in-out on me in all her Elven fury- and as Lady Galadriel creeched the Wondrous Ninth of Ludwig Van I saw it all again- smelly-welly Gollum-Wollum biting me Ring-finger off and plummeting down down down as I kicked him in the yarbles. The Ring was gone, Sauron offed, and Lady G spinning herself and me to ecstasy in a final roaring crescendo.
I was cured all right.
Chapter 7 published in the US 23 years later-
Opening-
"What's it going to be then, eh?"
There was me Your Humble Narrator- and my three droogs, that is Biblo, Gandalf and Elrond....
(Samwise comes in, tells of his wife and family, Frodo thinks of the wife & kids he missed out on but wonders if he could start again in the West Havens...)
And my son would find a Ring also, and go on a quest, and at the final moment he would probably falter and need his own Gollum to bite it off and so free his Middle-Earth from whatever Dark Lord then threatens and it would itty on like some great bolshy chelloveck engineered by Eru Illuvatar Himself... and so I go to seek a mate and do the old in-out and father me a itty-bit of a baby... I was like growing up, O my Brothers, but if you will, remember thy little Frodo that was. Amen. And all that cal.