In one thread, the discussion was about whether forgiveness was possible. By the end of the thread, I realized what we were really talking about was what this means for ourselves, and how this event will affect who we are from now on, as individuals.

As I said in that thread, it is a given that we as a nation will not and cannot "forgive", so to speak. And of course, the actions that our nation takes have to be based on different considerations than those we might have as individuals. What our government does is pretty much completely outside our control. So devoting ourselves to debating and discussing what military, police, or intelligence actions might be taken is interesting, perhaps, and instructive, but it doesn’t really mean anything, it’s just us venting.

What we do have control over, and what does make a difference in the long run are the choices we make as individuals. Those choices are about how we respond to what has happened. How we talk to our children, how we face the future, how we deal with fear, how we deal with our neighbors, and most important of all, what we choose to hold in our hearts.

This is, as we all know, an extraordinary moment historically, politically, nationally, internationally. But it is also an extraordinary moment for each one of us personally. None of us will go on from here the same as we were two weeks ago. The question is…will we be better? Will we be worse? Will we like who we are? Will we dwell in rage and fear? Will we focus on how much we want to hurt those who have hurt us? Will we spend our contemplative moments imagining the revenge we will have, or the love we feel for our fellow beings? Will we be enhanced or diminished by our reaction to this unspeakably horrible act?

One of the most wonderful things that has emerged from this is the way people have gotten in touch with their humanity and their compassion. Not only compassion for the actual victims, but simply for each other. I see more affection, more warmth, more patience in the world, and that is a beautiful thing.

I loved seeing Dan Rather cry…not because I want him to be consumed by grief, of course, but because I like seeing him be real. He’s just a fellow human in this insane time, and his visible grief made me feel more connected to him as a human being, instead of that famous guy that reads the news.

There was a piece done on Morgan Stanley getting back to work in temporary offices, and they showed all these financial types hugging and kissing each other. They asked the boss: "So, before this, was Morgan Stanley known for being a touchy-feely kind of company?" and he said "Not at all." The fact that it took something this dreadful for these people to connect with each other is bad, but the fact that they are connecting is wonderful.

I notice people being gentler with each other. My best friend, who drives much more than I do, tells me that the courtesy on the road is almost funny. "You go first. No, you. Please, be my guest!" And that’s a wonderful thing.

I was also warmed to hear about Muslim Americans, and how, while they certainly have had to endure some ugliness, they wanted Nightline to be sure to emphasize that the majority of people have been kind, thoughtful, and considerate. How great is that, coming form a country that only 50 years ago locked up its Japanese citizens?

We have threads aplenty debating and discussing just how evil an act this was, how it should be responded to, etc. But again, I want to talk about, and I want everyone to consider, is not how we are going to respond to the acts as a nation, but how each of us as individuals is going to carry this in our hearts. How we are going to let it inform our future, and are we going to do so at all. Is this a temporary wave of compassion we are feeling? Can we keep it alive? Are we being nationalistic, or humanistic? Are we going to become depressed, or let these events galvanize us into cherishing our lives? If we spoke everything in our heads aloud…would we be proud of ourselves?

I share some quotes that have meant something to me this week, quotes which I’d like you to consider in light of your personal response to this, not our national one:

The causal chain that created this violence is one in which compassion and wisdom are absent.

Many will be asking your opinion of these events. Each question is an opportunity for you to contribute to the love that is in the world or to the fear that is in the world.

This is an opportunity for a massive expression of compassion. It is also an opportunity for a massive expression of revenge. Which world do you intend to live in -- a world of revenge or a world of compassion?

Peace is a choice. A choice we make every day of how we will act and react to our circumstances and the world around us. It is the willingness to first and always seek understanding, to continually nurture and be secure in our own compassion, and to purposefully use our God-given intelligence and humanity to move toward that which we desire most - Love and Acceptance.

And some pledges:

I will propose that this is a perfect moment to break through to a deeper level of understanding about who you really are and why you are here.

I will relentlessly steer fear in the direction of love every chance I get.

And of course, the sig I've been using all week.

This is an opportunity. Each one of has has to choose to seize it or squander it.

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